I've walked 21,000 steps today
Which is a good start.
I set off from the costal Town of Mundesley under grey skies
I chose to walk along the beach and although I'd checked the tides I couldn't help thinking that if the tide changed quickly I'd be a bit stuck with unscalable cliffs on my left.
Blue was in his element running up and down covering ten times the distance I was (about 8 miles)
The walking was tough being on shingle, soaked sand and in places grey clay where the cliffs have eroded bringing boulders and pieces of human habitation down from the cliffs above.
The coast has the remains of huge World War 2 coastal defences with pillboxes, gun emplacements and huge concrete blocks and rusting iron girders sticking out like broken teeth.
We walked 6 miles without seeing a soul
I became very emotional and I have no idea why.
Maybe the isolation or maybe I was focusing on my loss more than normally.
A strange sensation to be honest and something I wasn't really expecting
Maybe it's been seeing all the thousands of posts on the 320,000 step fb page
All those babies and all those lives unlived
Maybe it was just that I had time for nothing else but to remember that time and all that could have been.
The rain came in brief bouts
Blue got stuck in some thick yellow mud and I had to pull him out.
We saw no wildlife except for gulls and the occasional cormorant or shag (childish laughter) sat on the groynes fishing.
I kept my eye out for sea glass which is rare here and picked up the odd stone or fossil
Eventually we came across Overstrand a small fishing village with the crab boats coming in
The men stood around chatting as we headed to the Cliff top Cafe
After we had both had a sizable breakfast/lunch we headed along the cliff tops and eventually we saw the distant sight of the pier
Passing the lighthouse on the left I put Blue on the lead as the cliff tops were high and crumbling into the sea
Finally down into Cromer
A walk across town to pick up Amelie from Nursery and finally home.
She ran, jumped and gabbled away about her day whilst I hobbled along increasing aware of how old I am and how pitifully unfit I was
Still this is just day one
So many more days to come.
Thank you all for donating again today
I'm thinking a thousand pounds would be a great amount to raise by the end of the month
PLEASE DONATE TO THIS GREAT CAUSE.
This was Molly's Nursery
The lettering, the beautiful triangular set of draws. The stars the decoration
It brings back so many memories.
The hope, excitement, the expectation
Then the devastation, the loss
Returning home and having to take everything away. The stupid woman in the local charity shop refusing to take the brand new pram/ pushchair from me
Walking back home with it crying my eyes out.
The feeling that I had somehow let Claire down.
Feeling nothing but emptiness.
There were two owls transfers on the wall that eventually adorned Molly's tiny coffin.
This is all what nine couples a day go through
I'm surprised how shocking and emotive looking at this photo has been.
It makes the journey we have both undertaken since that time all the more remarkable
I really don't know how we have done it!
Breaking the Silence
Dibs Hulme, Patron, Frontman, Multi Talented Musician Space Lord, Master of the Universe, Slimmer of the year, Friend
And did those shirts in ancient times
Walk into pubs on village greens
And was the hand of Molly Mear
In snugs and bars so often seen?
Bring me my Pint of Burning Gold
Slake my thirst to my desire
Bring me some crisps, packets unfold
Tasty Thai chilli flavours of fire
We shall not cease from mental fight
Nor shall our drinks slip from our hand
Till we see Mollys hand so proud
In every pub across the land.
Thank you Valerie Rowe and Bryan Rowe
Molly in the King Alfred Arms Tintagel Cornwall
We need to see Molly in your local please
We will post her up every day in a different hostelry
Mearfest.org Something Amazing.
Apart from the tiny ink impressions of Mollys hands and feet this is all we have of our full term daughter.
She sits on our window at home.
We have no gravestone or marker, no memorial plaque or brass plate
No tree or statue, no wooden bench or cross.
What we do have though is her legacy shared through music and poetry, art and imagery
Molly lives in so many ways
Take a look at what we do in her name
Take a look at what the Heavy Metal community do in her name in over 40 countries around the World.
Molly was born just 2 days before her full term due date.
She was born without a voice. Silent.
Now Seven Years on she has a voice of thousands.
TODAY SEVEN YEAR AGO, WE CREMATED HER.
I've spent 5 months of this year back on the ambulances.
Its been bloody awful if truth be known.
I thought earlier this year that Covid might have bought Mearfest to an end.
Far from it, Molly has been busy. We have gained over 800 new followers.
She's been immortalised in the Taunton Scrubbers tapestry (They have made brightly coloured scrubs for the NHS) that will be placed in various museums in the West Country.
She's been sang about, wrote about, drawn and painted. She has appeared on stage on the Isle of Man Worn all over the UK, Mainland Europe, Australia, Mexico, New Zealand and Japan.
We have had colouring competitions during the height of the Pandemic
She finally landed in South Africa and attended Parliament.
She's been talked about on radio and in the National Press.
She's helped us win a housing dispute along with Acorn the tenants Union.
She was on duty not only in the ambulance service but with the fire Brigade, police, St John's, with community responders. She accompanied people delivering the mail, electricians, builders, key workers in all areas of the NHS, Care homes, GP surgery's, In Retail, Supermarkets and with volunteers delivering food, care and welfare checks on the weak, sick, elderly and vulnerable
She's been with our Chaplain Revd Carl Flynn Edwards as he has continued his valuable work amongst his parish and further afield.
Bands have sent in items such as CDs, T shirts and memorabilia and Merch from all over the World to make our online Raffle a success
She has appeared on labels and flyers and sent in parcels all over the UK to NHS hospitals for Cradle the Charity to help Women who have lost a Preterm baby or have had an ectopic pregnancy.
You our Mearfest family have been amazing sending us so many cards and presents for Amelie's lock down third birthday.
So many of you sent me patches and badges which really cheered me up and helped me face going into work when I was really depressed and to be honest fearful.
We have also appointed Samantha Griffin as our Director of Publicity. She and her Husband Jay Griffin have already proven to be invaluable and have really started to move us forward.
Our shirts have been very successful thanks to Martin Walkyier and his team.
All this has happened and much, much more.
Behind the scenes there has also been a lot going on that isn't seen
We talk and engage with parents that have lost their babies, we talk and tell our own stories
Claire does a lot of photographic work which helps Parents in many ways.
We are aware that this year has been very difficult and distressing for so many of us
We have tragically lost some wonderful people this year
So many people have major worries, financial and health. Many of you have lost loved ones.
Some have lost jobs or sadly homes.
Thank you for everything you have all done for us as a family and for our lost daughter Molly.
Nothing goes unnoticed.
You have kept the faith
My good friend Steven Pasquali with his daughter Jessica.
This was taken in America, Steve lives in New Zealand and we both worked together on the Ambulances in Bracknell.
STEVE & JESSICA
Brian & Claire Mear pride themselves on putting on a good show. Photography is Claire's passion, only the finest collection of images will be added here by the best photographers.